Utter the words , with style

"cant you just tell me you are not going ?" , 1 sentence , thousand way to say it

by stressing some word , and using different tone can cause the different emotion fluctuate between 2 people talking.

"cant you JUST........  tell me you are not going ?" 
"CANT YOU JUST TELL ME YOU ARE NOT GOING ?" 
"cant you just tell me YOU~ are not going ?" 
"cant you just tell me you are NOT going ?"

I call this emotional colouring, we are colouring the word using our emotion. For example , the first sentence stress on "JUST", meaning that he really hope he had been informed about the absense
2nd sentence obviously meaning he is complete outrage
3rd sound like he is blaming the person more
emotional colouring are very hard topic to be discuss on written form, you have to feel the the emotion of the word , by listening to it. Believe me , its not an easy task to do.

we can even express the same idea , using different word.
- cant you just tell me you are not going ?
- why?
- ow .. why you not going , its gonna be fun
- what can be more important than my birthday party ?
- I really hope you can tell me why.

If combining this with the emotional colouring , you have 16 ways of asking the same question. Again its not an easy task to choose what word coming out of your mouth. Think before you speak is harder than it sound. Try to say a word calmly when you are angry, and you will feel it, most of the time , the best practice is not to speak at all to be secure , walk away.

Choosing the word , is not so that you can deceive other people, but you can express yourself more precisely. Your friend are not going to your party, and he is just inform you 1 hours before your party start.
If you are only curious why -  "why , are you busy or something ?"
if you don bother, but wan to hide the feeling - "too bad , tomorrow breakfast together ?"
if you are totally furious, but don wan to hurt your friendship - "how about you tell me earlier, so I can arrange it"
if he and done it time and time again and you decide enough is enough - "<insert any insult here>"


note: the idea above is a very experimental and yet to be proven , perhaps all the words are point to same idea and there's no emotional colouring thing.....